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The Not-So-Secret Symbols of Scientology
“You one of them Scientologists?”
The bearded semi-driver behind me at Costco Gas pointed at me as he said it. I couldn’t tell from his voice if it was an accusation or a census question, so I said, “Yes. Does it show?”
He pointed at my rear bumper. “You got one of them Scientology things there. What is that, anyway?”
He grabbed his phone and began dialing a number while waving me away to resume pumping my gas.
The man was referring to the familiar Scientology symbol: the big letter “S” with two triangles.
“I’m guessing that ‘S’ stands for Scientology, right?” he continued.
“Right,” I said, joining him at my rear bumper.
“What about those triangles? Is that some mystical voodoo thing?”
“No,” I said, “But they work better than voodoo. That lower triangle is how to get along with people. Affinity-Reality-Communication: ARC. Affinity is how much you like someone. Reality is how much you agree with someone. Communication is how much you feel like saying things to them and hearing what they’ve got to say.”
“So what?” he said.
“So it’s a triangle because if one corner goes down, so do the other two. If you fight with someone, you’ve got a disagreement, your realities are different. So your affinity and communication will go down. You won’t like them so much and you won’t feel like talking to them. But again, since it’s a triangle, all you have to do is pick up one corner and strengthen it, and the other two will go right up.”
“So like I could get her flowers—that’s the Affinity part, yeah?”
“That’s right. That’ll make her feel like talking to you and sorting out the disagreements. You always have three choices. And then the top triangle—”
“Wait! Wait a second—”
He grabbed his phone and began dialing a number while waving me away to resume pumping my gas. I heard him say, “Florist? Yeah, I need something nice—” as I returned to my car. After a few minutes, I was done pumping the gas and was about to drive off when he yelled, “Wait! Stop!”
By this time, the cars waiting behind us were getting impatient, as evidenced by the insistent beeps. “I gotta go!” I yelled back.
“What’s the other triangle?”
“KRC. Knowledge-Responsibility-Control. Same deal but with situations in life and work. If something’s out of your control, just get more knowledge about it—find out more about it—and you’ll be able to take more responsibility for it and get it more under control.”
“This is good stuff,” he shouted, putting his truck in drive. “No wonder you guys keep it a secret.”
“Secret?” I thought, as I drove away. “Scientology Network, viewed in over 240 countries and territories worldwide in 17 languages is ‘secret’? Dianetics, the all-time bestseller on the human mind, is ‘secret’? If you only knew, brother, how un-secret we make it. If you only knew!”
